Why is it that we get most upset at the people we love? Why do they bring out the best and the “worst” in us? Being in a relationship isn’t easy. Our relationships are our mirrors for our own emotional development and what we see in the mirror isn’t always pretty. The people we love the most – our partners, girlfriends, husbands, and family members – are the people that bring out the most intense emotions in us. The vulnerability of an intimate relationship can be difficult, scary and volatile. When we really let someone see who we are, we can feel more sensitive and reactive to them. Our romantic relationships and the way that we bond with our significant other can be traced back to how we bonded with our attachment figures. The emotional challenges that come up in our adult relationships have their roots in the first relationships we formed as children – with our caregivers.
Emotionally Focused Therapy is an approach to couples therapy that helps people understand the patterns they get into in relationships. The idea is that the “attachment style” that we developed as a child heavily influences how we relate to others as adults, especially in romantic relationships. I teach clients about the different roles that we take on, where that may have started, and what we can do to positively shift them. This blog post from Psychology Today explains how our attachment style affects our relationships.
$120 per session (50 minute sessions)
I do not accept insurance for Couples Counseling